Am I dreaming?
We arrive by plane after airport hopping from LA to London to Narobi, ending in Entebbe Uganda, a lush green tropical setting armed with Pakistani military troops hovered under a low ceiling makeshift barn. After losing one baggage and a good hour of standing in the lost line, I finally join my group to continue our purpose. The date is November 2nd, 2007. We drive to the capital, Kampala for lunch and are surrounded by the big city noise, people, large buildings and crazy traffic. (There aren’t really any traffic laws here, it’s days later we learn more about how much we are glad not to be the driver)
The people here do whatever they need to do to survive. There are two groups, the rich and the poor; unlike America, there isn’t a middle class. Though they don’t have many societal distractions, I’ve found that they are rich in spirit/faith. Their love for Christ is everything that most people here in the states want, but are to caught up in societal desires.
November 3rd, 2007 – memory entry
Where do we begin? The chicken coop to become masters at brick laying? Okay. I learned from the locals there is a right way and a wrong way of laying brick…who knew? The pretty side of the brick goes down in the mortar…the ugly side lays upward (it was hard to determine which side was the pretty and which was the ugly…so my new friends had to help me determine…thank you Carol!!!). What a hot day it turned out to be…after hauling brick from the pile to the coop and stacking it, we all took part in laying it…it’s so nice to watch the work you’ve done actually become something. It was awesome to pitch in, even though I know this won’t become a future job…I look forward to a day when I can see it completed and in full function.
November 6th, 2007 – journal entry
I’m sorry it’s been a few days since entering…it’s just that it’s easy to get caught up in Uganda time. Each day we become more attached to this little village of big hearts. I am sitting on the deck out by the water as a cool breeze blows by, my hair like a feather floating in the wind. Oh Lord…how beautiful is your earth. How I thank you for breath in the morning to find and spread you attitude amongst my new friends (Carol, Michael, David, Ivan, Jack, Florence, Grace, and Michael). They all have such big dreams for their future…I pray they will live them out!
It’s a tropical paradise here…I could live among these people and in these conditions for sometime. I’ve adapted well, so I think, but know I need to return to America, and ponder why? This land is a secluded peninsula near Ggaba; a lost way, an encouraging way…they all love you Lord so much. The children praise you with their full hearts, something I’m often hard on myself for lacking. Where am I Lord? I’ve lost myself here among the culture.
I just met 3 boys, Richard who wants to be an aircraft mechanic (he was in the Mwangaza Children’s Choir), Joseph who wants to be a pilot, and Thomas who would like to be a doctor. They all love to play soccer…seems to be the big sport out here. There was intensity in their eyes Lord…love in their hearts…they adore Bethany Village.
Before going back to join the others, another boy sat with me on the dock, Caway, he loved math…wants to be a pilot…cute kid. I was leaning on my hand as he ran his fingers over my skin. I told him we are the same, just a different color. It’s amazing how many kids here have never really seen a Mzungu (white man). If they have, this shows they really haven’t spent much one-on-one time with one.
It’s evening now, our group just had a dinner calamity of worship and great fellowship. There’s lots of laughter among us; And the beginning of new friendships as we share contact information and tell stories comparing our cultures.
November 7th, 2007 – journal entry
Mornin’ so hot, bright, tropical and peaceful; this day is filled with hope my Lord, with love so I see. It gathers my flesh to see Your light in the eyes of Your children. It challenges my heart, my thoughts, and my emotions. How to act with my flesh on arise. How to just be without feeling so guilty. When to respond as my tongue finds words to speak. Knowledge of your word is a powerful tool…how will I know better than I already do? How much more challenged can I be when invited to share so much of You, yet my flesh pulls me back. I am afraid, I am scared, I am free to roam, and I am lost without You in my life. Help me find You, help me keep You warm in my heart Lord…take my infant hand and lead me to places unseen. Shant I not want and desire this love that surrounds all that I can be? The water in its mist flowing through Your earth keeping me afloat, so much to learn, and so much to understand. Let me listen as Your soul bleeds to feed me; Help me find my voice.
Dig deep LORD…deeper and deeper to grab hold of what’s been lost in the inside and tug out the scared that I hid so well, pull tears from my eyes, let me grieve my past and repent my sins. My Love, My Lord I want to feel You in me. I want You to purchase my heart as Your home…live there, breathe there…love there where hope and faith are an eternal bound. I want to be Your light and am learning there is no right or wrong way to do so: though within me I am hard. I am still. I want to be alive, make me ALIVE!
Help me to see, smell, taste, and touch Your need, like a flower scent dances on the wind…may my work prove good in others; though I may not see it develop I will remember the journey in prayer. I will remember in recant moments. I will remember in familiar sounds, tastes, and words.
Prayer: Thank You Lord for the love, the direction, Your hands that hold me. Thank You for weighting on my heart what has been forgotten. Thank You for support, without it my hope would be a lost child in the forest. Thank You for the clouds for they entertain my playfulness. Thank You for the wind that fills me with familiar and foreign scents. Thank You for allowing us all to build relationships within fellowship. Thank You Christ for open hearts, for generosity, hospitality, love and for all things that leave me speechless. You are an amazing God…lead us all to your light…use me Lord to do Your will. Amen.
November 9th, 2007 – memory entry
We are to have a party…let our hair down, listen to the choir, then shake our own tail feathers. The choir…WOW! Those voices…they lift Your name on high Lord…so beautiful. The children can sing, dance and praise so heavenly…with big smiles of glory spread on their faces.
It’s evening, the children are sleeping and the staff has just cranked up Jeremy Camp. There’s to be a hoedown had on this floor. The great staff we had blessed us with their singing voices the night before, I wonder what they have up their sleeves tonight.
Dancing…lots of dancing burning the midnight oil until we all are exhausted. Getting the men on the floor was like pulling teeth (I’m sure John Wayne danced sometime in his life…you can too). The women and Willie’s kids danced a lot as the men folk circled their wagons to ward off any lures, though some got caught with good charm. Thank you Francis, David, Wilbur, Debra, Timothy, and everyone else that I missed for dancing with me that evening…truly I had a wonderful time!
November 10th, 2007 – journal entry
This morning’s sunrise a resemblance of heaven, the glory of sunrise over the eastern earth and hell the melancholy of gloom as lightening whips the dark grumbling sky. We are to leave today…but treat it no different than any day we have woken up here.
Our boat left promptly to the city of Ggaba, just in time for our bus to arrive and say our goodbyes or see you later’s to the staff. A lot of sad faces, but may they know we will be back, for they all have nestled a special place in our hearts, never to be forgotten, always prayed about, and faith in seeing them again.
God has made me alive…with thought, with love, with prayer. Thank you friends and family for your love. You are all so generous to give; may your spirit spread like wild fire among the believers and unbelievers. I love you.
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